The poetry of gratitude in VAD
All those who have accompanied a loved one through voluntary assisted dying (VAD) experience a wide range of emotions. Among them, gratitude stands out as a profound and often overlooked sentiment.
Gratitude, in this context, is more than simple appreciation; it is a layered emotion, intertwined with relief, empowerment, and even ambivalence. As research has shown, people applying for VAD express gratitude for:
- Avoiding prolonged suffering and the uncertainty of a painful death.
- Retaining agency in choosing how and when they die, rather than being overtaken by illness.
- A sense of peace, relief and comfort in choosing VAD.
- The presence of compassionate caregivers and medical professionals guiding them through the process.
- Gratitude for lawmakers for allowing VAD laws to pass.
Gratitude here is not just about the act of choosing VAD—it extends to the people who make the journey possible: doctors who listen, laws that recognise autonomy, and loved ones who offer unwavering support.
The role of poetry in capturing VAD gratitude
The End of Life Law team at Queensland University of Technology has produced a research paper exploring the role of gratitude in VAD, using research poetry - an arts-based method that transforms interview transcripts into poetic expressions.
Poetry distills raw emotions into poignant narratives, allowing voices to be heard in an intimate and moving way. Through verse, patients and families reflect on their experiences, offering insight into their gratitude.
Consider this excerpt from a research participant: "He looked around and he says, 'This is perfect, thank you,' and then he drinks it." These words capture the quiet dignity, peace, and self-determination that VAD can provide.
The researchers Prof Ben White and Ruthie Jeanneret worked alongside Professor Evonne Miller, who has used research poetry extensively, and award-winning poet Professor Sarah Holland-Batt. They created six poems to give voice to the main themes of gratitude.
The following poem expressed the idea that patients retained ‘a choice’ through VAD when everything was being taken away’ by the illness:
Peeling away an onion.
Cancer had taken so many things away from him
His health
His hobbies
His peer group
You become very, very isolated
Culturally, we are afraid
Afraid of saying the wrong thing
So people say… Nothing
Like peeling away an onion, he lost everything
Other than this core part of him
His ability to go with agency
– Family caregiver 2, female, 36
This poem captured the ambivalence felt by participants about their loved one's death - gratitude mixed with grief:
He had the final say
He got to go his way
It's awful in one sense
But we're so blessed in another
I want that for my loved one
But it's still not right
Because Dad's not here
I wish he was here
– Family caregiver 9, female, 60; Family caregiver 3, female, 48
Shaping conversations and policy
Gratitude for VAD does not exist in isolation—it has the power to influence public understanding, reduce stigma, and shape policy debates. When families express appreciation for the peaceful nature of a loved one's death, it highlights the importance of legal access to VAD in jurisdictions where it remains restricted.
Stories of gratitude can serve as powerful testimonials for law reform, advocating for compassionate end-of-life choices.
Research poetry offers a compelling way to articulate the gratitude surrounding VAD, making deeply personal experiences accessible to a wider audience. By listening to these voices and reflecting on their meaning, we can reduce the stigma attached to VAD and enhance awareness of this important end-of-life choice.
Read the briefing paper here or click the image below
